Acquisitive Disorders
and  Narcissistic  Disorders

There was an article in the New York Times (Dec.2003) which quoted various articles related to acquisition of material goods as a focus of human goals rather than goals such as achievement in work, building social relationships, living a moral life. The article mentions compulsive shoppers, people who focus on material things, and relates these symptoms to different diagnoses such as acqusitive disorder (new one) or an old one such as narcissistic personality disorder.

In my opinion, most people are acqusitive, narcissistic. These are basic human instincts. We are not "bad" people because we have these instincts, which is what I think readers often come away with. They say with some recognition, "hey, that's me" and are left with a self-attack.

The only thing that's bad is when behavior is hurtful to the self and others and thus interferes with gratifications in life that one might have if these behaviors were modified. For instance, one motive related to talking to others is the attention it gets. Everyone wants attention. It is a common human need. However, if someone monopolizes a conversation it might serve to alienate people, the opposite goal that one seeks.

The following is a compilation of many instances in therapy but it is a true account. Once I asked a group member what compelled her to behave in a certain manner in group. She said, "I want attention." To me this response was unusual and so refreshing! People go around doing all sorts of things to get attention, but if someone out load says "I want attention" it can likely evoke a feeling of shame. How often were we told as children, "What's the matter with you, you want too much attention." And shame can be paralyzing.

Dr. Sehl would be interested in hearing about therapists' and patients' experience around these issues. Contact him today!